Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
