Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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