i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
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