it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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