Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Sext me about skeletons
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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