I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
