Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize