i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
It's rum buckets o'clock
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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