She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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