She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize
