I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
