Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
