I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
