hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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