I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
