Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
