Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
