you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
