Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
