Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
My vagina just clenched in fear
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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