he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Will exercising make me less horny?
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