I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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