Yo dont text me then not text me
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Randomize
