Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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