I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
so that wasnt chicken after all
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
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