I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
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