so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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