My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
