i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You are the jesus of drinking
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize