Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
