Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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