According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
