plz talk dirty to me
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Randomize
