So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
She's the barista slut.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
