Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
