I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
