It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
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