Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
