too bad you live with your parents still
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
