Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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