The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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