Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
