i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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