My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
