I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
