Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
you never un-have a 4some
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
