You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
