She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
