so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
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