And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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